no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
