You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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