I CAN MOONWALK!
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
