What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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