I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
