I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
