wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Randomize
