do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
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