How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
We talked him into tasing himself.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
