i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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