So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
