It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
