I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
