we're blogging at a bar
I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
