Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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