I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
