We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
