Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
