I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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