We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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