butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize