Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
