So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Randomize
