dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Randomize
