My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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