i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Terrible idea I love it
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
