that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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