I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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