never play flip cup with pint glasses
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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