i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
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