What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Randomize
