i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
The struggles of a small town man whore
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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