my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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