left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
