I bet he comes in French.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
