i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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