Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Gay?
German.
Pity.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
