sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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