I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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