it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
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