Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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