Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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