yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
