Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Randomize
