It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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