normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
