It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
