Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
