Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
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