I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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